Hello all! It’s been a while. I don’t think I posted at all this year, even with the disappearing months snafu. 2019 was... rough. I have been working on reflecting this week since I have the week and a half off due to the holidays. I really don’t have a whole lot of nice things to say about the year other than we survived.

The one awesome thing is that my kid had another major surgery and came out of it really well. I am so thankful that is over and it should be the last one he has!

The rest of the year was not so stellar. We ended up leaving the apartment early and moving back in with my parents who are a godsend. I ended up pulling my oldest out of kindergarten due to anxiety and lack of supports (despite it being one of the best schools for special education around) and am homeschooling which has its awesome days and not so awesome days. I was sick three out of the last four months with various colds and pneumonia with my kids joining in with their own colds in between. I am struggling to finish my masters (one more semester!). My office had a high turnover in a 9-month period. I am wearing multiple hats, am a veteran after 2 years, and it sucks. I don’t see the turnover stopping yet though either. Oh, and let’s top it off with our yearly winter ER visit #1 with my kid spiking a scary 105 fever (gone by the time we got checked in, of course). And my dog tore her canine ACL and she had surgery on it this past week, so I am dealing with that recovery process.

So, yeah. Rough year. We survived!

Financially, I am ending in an ok place. I have some savings, but not where I want to be. I have about 3 months' salary saved in the emergency fund. I will likely have to raid some of it to pay off the vet on my credit card. My goal is to get 6 months to a year in my EF. I have a rainy-day fund for car issues but once again, I am leasing a new car when I needed to have just chosen and bought one. I just didn’t have the energy at that time. HSA is fully funded and barely touched thanks to supplemental insurance this year. I paid off my student loans, then took $5k out for this past semester due to cash flow issues. I am planning to pay it off by the time I graduate in May.

So not too shabby financially, still an ugh of a year. I am mentally, emotionally, and physically drained. I am ready for 2019 to be DONE.

2020 goals are being hard to set. I saw a joke recently of “I don’t know what I am doing in a week... I don’t have 2020 vision!” and thought it was rather fitting. My word of the year is going to be "Vision". I hope to get my “vision” back so I can be in the moment, not exhausted, and be forward-looking with plans.

Some vague goal thoughts include me getting healthy, rocking homeschooling, fixing my work somehow, getting back to seriously saving, graduating, and enjoying life. Any one of those is a tall order, so I will have to narrow it down somehow, but first is recovery and this week off is helping.

I do read everyone's posts almost daily and am so glad you are all posting frequently. It is a joy to read your stories and see how everyone grows over time. Thank you all for taking the time to do so!

Moved to an apartment this summer to get into a specific school district. Still searching for houses. I swear there is another bubble as small, old, dated houses are going fast at high prices. Can't even entertain anything that was built in the last 20 years. Beginning to think if I don’t save for 100% of a house and build my own, I will never find anything. I am starting a “new” job on Monday with a big pay increase with awesome benefits. First job where I feel like I am accurately employed with a salary that fits the work I do. Kids are great, but more medical issues on horizon for the youngest. MRIs and likely a surgery.

Thoughts and prayers to all those on this community who are going through hard times. I think about everyone a lot, even though I don’t post much. Sending my love.

I am so very glad it is April. I am considering this month an important turning stone in the year. I am determined to get back on track and rock the remaining 3/4 of the year.

*FORCED WAITING PERIOD*
So the IRS decided to notify me that they are reviewing my taxes. They should tell me in 60 days, but if I don't hear by then, I am supposed to "call the above number"... which gets me stuck in an automated round about system, never to get a person. Sigh. $8k is in limbo until who knows when.

*SO SICK*
End of February and most of March was rough. We were all very, very sick with stomach flu and then influenza type A. One kid had a hospital stay due to dehydration and reaction to Tamiflu. I lost about 1/3 of my take home pay due to unpaid time after blasting through the little PTO I had saved up.

*NOT SPENDING EVERYTHING!*
Despite that, kids' new shoes, new glasses, lots of random purchases, and eating out when at work, I managed to not spend every penny I made in the month. It was my first month tracking my spending in a long time, and I think I found my system. Back to my basic love.... Excel. I can't seem to track as I spend, but once a week I can double check my credit card (98% of my spending) and see where I stand. Quicken and other systems take too much maintenance for me.

*CATCH UP TIME*
So, now that I am kind of back on track with work and home things.... anyone have any ideas how to catch up on a month's worth of homework and papers? I am so far behind, it isn't funny. At this point, I am just hoping to pass, barely.

Happy Easter!

I have decided to take my tax refund (whenever I actually get it) and park it for awhile. I felt like I was jumping in without looking and I need to let my emotions not override logic.

Part of this decision is that I feel like I am at a crossroads where change is coming. Not sure what, but its one of those "feel it in your bones" kind of change. Luckily, it is an optimistic feeling, so I am looking forward to it

However, I have no clue what type of change it is. It might be career, but it could be something completely different. We shall see.

I did my taxes last night. From what I understand, I didn't make enough in the year to be taxed much, plus with the two kids, taking out too much from my paychecks since I wasn't sure how divorce would pay out... I am getting a LOT back. To the tune of $9k. Still in shock.

This completely revamps my 2018 goals. I am almost panicking. What will I do with that cash?!? Part of me just wants to put it straight towards house down payment and start looking. The other part of me wants to follow the plan. The third part of me just wants to wipe out a huge chunk of the financial aid student loan. The last part of me wants to spend it on things I don't need.

Logical me goes- use to to pay off a chunk of the studen loan. Just do it. Get it gone, one less thing to worry about. I am not quite ready to buy a house yet, so while the money would be wonderful towards that, it would be sitting there not doing much for quite some time.

AHHHHH! I should just pay off the entire student loan. I can if I take a bit of my extra in the savings for the program and the refund and the extra that I will be getting this semester after paying tuition....

It will delay my starting for saving for a house by 3 months, but I think I am ok with that. Am I ok with that? Yes. No. Oh, I don't know!

Luckily I have some time since taxes aren't being processed until tomorrow, and WI taxes are a few days behind that. Plus I haven't received my financial aid refund yet.

Logically, need to get rid of student loans. Evil, necessary things, be gone!

I think I finally have my 2018 goals figured out. It took awhile, but I am happy with my decision.

1) $250 per week will be saved until end of May to save up for the rest of my Masters program for this year and next so that I do not have to take out any more financial aid.

2) $250 per week June to December will be saved towards a down payment on a new house. I will also throw any "leftover" funds I have all year towards this goal, including tax refund.

3) Should I reach these goals early, I will then start tackling my student loans which are just shy of $14,000.

I think that will be it for monetary goals this year. I am fully out of credit card debt, have a $1k emergency fund, and am saving weekly for car expenses. I am not planning on any vacations that can't be cash-flowed with my weekly budget. I also am not expecting any other large dental or medical expenses (besides our normal maxing out of pocket).

Now if I could just curb my eating out lunches and work parking expenses... I have started writing it down, but in all honesty, I just need better sleep, healthy kids and me, and more time at home to prep lunches and to actually go grocery shopping.
Hoping as spring comes that will get easier.

It was a long year that I am glad to be over with. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good. Just lots of stuff. Lots of time-consuming stuff.

However, I am ending on a positive note financially! I calculate my net worth by adding all my cash accounts and debt. I do not watch my 401k enough to follow it yet, so that is excluded. I also do not have any assets as I lease a car and live with my parents. I started the year with a net worth of -$278, and I am ending with only -$693! This is despite lawyer fees for my divorce, unemployment, taking on student loans, and a family loan out (that they have officially paid back!)! I am very proud of myself considering my worst month I was at -$29,684. Woah! Go me!

My 2018 goals are still conflicted. There will be some mix of paying off debt and saving. I just don't know what yet.

In all honesty, I am just too tired to think of goals and am fighting off one hell of a cold that has given my family pneumonia and bronchitis. I am crossing my fingers it doesn't come to that for me. My work time has taken a LARGE hit due to all the sickness, and hopefully, my coworkers will continue to be understanding. As a consultant, it is a hard thing to balance. I am going to have to figure out how to balance work-home life in 2018 as it is not working out as well as I had hoped.

I had been struggling for awhile on how to handle debt vs saving. The biggest issues for me are the need to be debt free, paying for schooling, and getting my own place. Depending on the day, it fluctuates which one "wins".

A huge chunk of my family loan was paid back, so I got to pay a chunk of my CC debt down. But between that and my unemployment money, I was sitting on about $4k to finish filling my HSA this year.

I decided against doing that today. For one, neither the kids or I will have a HSA plan next year. I know I could still use the funds, but I could no longer contribute. The real reason to not fund it ended up being that I was tired of dealing with this remote credit union. So I will be closing the account after the last bit is paid on this month's PT bill.

So... instead I used that money to finish paying off my 7.5% Whole Life loan! Yahoooo!

All that is left of my consumer debt is about $8k in credit cards which will be paid off with the last of the family loan this month. I will have zero consumer debt! However, I will have around $10k in student loans. Bugger.

Now I am pondering my next steps. I will have consumer debt paid. I have $1k in an EF. I am fully funding my car maintenance etc fund. I am saving so I won't need to take out more student loans. Christmas, birthdays etc will be cashflowed into my normal budget easily. Health money for next year has been figured out. I still will have money leftover every month to tackle... something.

The next questions I am tackling are:
- Do I work on paying down student loans? Being debt free sounds really good.
- Do I work on building a huge EF? I would like to not be in the same situation again.
- Do I start building a savings fund for my own place? I will need furniture and normal household supplies on top of down payments/security deposit, so this will be large, I think.
- Do I do a mix and feel like I am getting no where? The snowball method is the most motivating for me.

I am torn. I would LOVE to get my own place and feel like a real adult, no longer "burdening" my amazing parents.

But I do need to be more financial secure to be able to do that.

Plus I have found that the housing market in my area has ballooned again. Fixer upper, small houses that I could have gotten for $120k previously are selling for close to $200k. That is a huge jump for me, and I am worried about the market popping again. But I am not sure renting works for my kids. Shared walls/floors/ceilings are not an option, and house rental prices are just as crazy here. I remember when my parents bought a $200k house when we were young, and we were in the "rich" neighborhood. Now, the same house is priced for $440k. Yowch

Add in that I am a "contractor", I could face unemployment again in a year. Although, with my degree (should be almost done by then), I will be in a good position to find a job quickly. It helps that I also now know that I can work a normal full time job with my kids, as long as the job has some flexible hours allowed, so my hunt will be a lot easier and less stressful.

Having written this out, I think what I need to do is put aside a mortgage payment every month into savings. It can be a cushion until I decide what to do. Then with whatever is leftover, I will tackle the student loan debt slowly. That way I know I can handle the payment AND I can pay down debt. I need to remember to include utilities into my mortgage amount though. That is sometimes a forgotten cost. Time to go to a mortgage calculator!

Thanks for listening to my ramble! It helps to write it all out!

I have started my job! I am second week in, although I am off most of this week due to kids' major medical appointments. I get my first paycheck tomorrow. Take home for 40hrs before benefits kick in in a few months is $827.48.

I also appealed my unemployment insurance denial and won! I have 8 weeks of back pay and will be getting one more week once they review it. Whew!

So now I need to sit down and figure out what to do with steady income. I cannot remember the last time I was in this situation. It feels good.

On top of that, the family loan will be paid back this next month-ish. Right when I predicted. Whew. Everything might be lining up, finally. Patience and hard work sure do pay off in the end.

I got another call from my new firm. My original start date was supposed to be the 4th. Then was pushed back to the 11th at the earliest. And now, the 18th is the earliest. Good thing I am unemployed and flexible? I cannot imagine what I would be thinking if I had given two-week notice and had to wait two extra weeks out of the blue. The "excuse" is that they literally have to build me a space to work on top of getting all the tech stuff set up. Makes sense, but wouldn't they have known that when going through the months of the hiring process?

At some point, I really would like to get a stable job. Really. Please? Any day now?

So, an acquaintance is struggling with Wisconsin unemployment office as well. And I am feeling much calmer. It isn't just me.

Basically, since I took and quit three months later an every-other-weekend job while working full time before, during, and after at a benefit job that I was laid off from, I was denied unemployment benefits. Mind you, I quit with two week notice at the part-time job with a lot of valid reasons, and long before I was notified of being laid off.

It feels unfair that I took a job to supplement full time job to pay off some bills, and get screwed over for it.

I am still appealing, but I am not a great speaker and not feeling great about my chances. At least I am not alone.

I have had a few months of phone interviews, and one in person one that I was offered. Not my dream job or title, not the pay I want, but doing the typical duties of my dream job. And it is a job.

However, I was supposed to start Tuesday after Labor Day. Today, the Friday afternoon of a holiday weekend, I had to call my recruiting company who called the client to see what time I was supposed to show up Tuesday. Thankfully my soon-to-be-supervisor was still working and my new start date will be the following week at the earliest.

Strangely that works out ok. I would have had to take two half days next week for kid specialists that I could not move. Plus it will be my oldest's first full week of 4K and I am still skeptical of the school and how they are going to handle his special needs.

However, in my new potentially first week of work, I will still have half a day off. That time will be going to go to Appeals Court for unemployment. I keep trying to write about it, but makes my blood boil and gives me angry shakes and insomnia.

Thank goodness for my parents supporting us during this period. THANK GOODNESS. I am indebted to them for forever.

BIG BREATH.

Not much else to report. I have a list a mile long of what I need/want to buy when I get a steady income. After seriously tackling the freaking insane amount of debt that is and getting a savings account back in place. Oh and maybe start saving for my own place and all the furnishings I no longer have and... and... and... a vacation. Really a hotel stay full of sleep, chick flicks, sleep, unhealthy foods, and did I mention sleep? Yeah. It will be good to have steady income again.

Unemployment was denied. I am appealing. It stinks when the system's safety net fails you. It took a month for them to deny me and even though I filled appeal right away, the appeal court probably won't be scheduled for a month plus. Sigh.

I have applied to jobs, have had quite a few phone call interviews and a handful of in-person. No results yet. I am told my resume and interviewing are great, but that they are pursuing other candidates.

Summer session for my Masters is done, I have a scholarship for a class-worth this fall and I will be getting student loans for the other class. It should help temporary cash-flow while I am waiting for unemployment and a job.

Other than that, trying to keep spending down, but I was already doing that. I have had some of my personal loans out to family come back and should be getting the rest within the next three months. Whew.

Now that I am unemployed, and all that goes with it, I am really wondering what I should do with my 401K. I just got my statement and it is $26k with some change with MassMutual. Should I leave it? Roll it over to an IRA? Wait for a new job that will hopefully have a retirement plan?

I have been debating on rolling over it to Capital One's ShareBuilder since then most of my accounts are in one place and I will see it more frequently. It would be the "easiest", but probably not the smartest?

I honestly have very little interest in actively managing stocks, as it is knowledge I am not interested in and I am horrendous at gambling/risk taking type things.

I know I do need to learn more, and I will, but my brain cannot take on more knowledge right now. I am out of time as it is between the kid's therapies, my schooling, job hunts, and trying to keep the household together.

Any thoughts? Helpful articles?

Well, I am officially unemployed. It is a good thing, strangely enough. I already have an interview set up next week and a few other leads. I don't expect to be unemployed for long.

My biggest hope is that I can FINALLY be employed in a steady income at the pay my skills deserve. I have been underpaid my whole career life due to a) not negotiating because I hate negotiations, b)being part of a family business, and c) too nice and too flexible.

So... on that note, any great advice on how to stick to my guns on salary? I have a number in my head I really, really would like to obtain. However, I am afraid that next week's interview is going to come in $15/hour lower than that, and that is too low to make it worthwhile to work and take my time away from my boys and their therapies.

Feeling good about my interview skills and my general job skills. I think I even have fall schedule figured out so that the boys' weekday care will be simplified and not too taxing. Cross fingers!

Surgery is behind us and we are on the road to recovery. Toddlers always amaze me on how well they bounce back. He is doing really well despite everything. Now onto straightening life back out and getting back into the new normal.

I thought I was doing ok with expenses until I got my last lawyer bill. In the end, I paid a few dollars shy of $9k for the entire process. But the divorce is done! Running really tight right now, but it will be ok!

I have a new job lead, but we will see if it turns into anything. I am open to finding new paths! I am bound and determined to turn this year around. By the end of the year, I will be on the right track!

Happy Mothers Day to all the moms here and the women who are "mother-figures" giving advice and support, and telling us to pull up our britches and get to work!

Patient Saver correctly called me out on my last post for being "pretty blase" about my debt. And she is completely right. :-)

Here is my excuse: I won't be able to concentrate on fixing it until mid-June at the earliest. I don't have the income to do anything at this moment, and I can't fix that until then.

My youngest toddler is going to be undergoing a major surgery here in a few weeks. Until then, we have a lot of appointments and things to wrap up. After the surgery, it could be months of recovery for him.

I will work on strengthing my income stream as soon as he is out of the hospital and we get thru the first rough week home. His health comes first at the moment and it has been an interesting ride.

I do expect repayment from my loan out sometime in the fall/early winter, with interest to cover all the transfer balance fees, etc it caused. And if I don't, well that was my risk.

Until then, 0% is awesome. I am not adding to it (except for the last lawyer bill that I will get at the end of the month). I put a little bit extra towards the debt everytime I can. I have reigned in spending. I am not ignoring the debt anymore and am coming up with plans to fix this and steps to implement them to get this gone.

So thank you for watching out for me, and helping me keep the energy going. I really do appreciate all you guys do for me!

I have drafted and tossed a few versions of blog entries. I kept trying to dodge the ever-present fact of my debt.

I have accumulated close to $25,000 in credit card debt. Almost all is 0% until next year. The non-0% is typically paid off within the month. I am currently making minimum payments on the other cards.

I have also taken out a 4.5% loan from my life insurance for $7,500. I am paying interest only and a tiny bit of a principle by rounding it up to $50.

$32,500 in debt.

Debt. Debt. Debt. I am officially divorced and all this debt is on me. Kind of scary, but I still feel in control, somehow?

How did I get here? Some of it is paying my lawyer (my side of the divorce will end up over $7k), some are for summer tuition ($2k - going back for a master degree at an online college). Well, and I also took out cash advances, special 0% pay off debt check offers... for a loan for my family. I loaned money during a difficult time. To the tune of $24,500

I should, in theory, be paid back for these loans with interest. I am hopeful. I think it will probably happen. But I also gave it out knowing that it could very well end up a gift. I am ok with that either way. It helped me and it helped them and it cut a lot of stress out of a LOT of people's lives.

So..... yeah. Debt. LOTS of debt.

How am I going to crawl out of this? I don't know. Probably just like you eat an elephant.... one bite at a time. I have been in worse places, so this is just another day. Won't be fast or easy, but I can do it!

It feels good to come clean.

February is always rough. This year was absolutely one of the worst financially. Cross fingers, though, I think things are starting to stabilize this month. I am not even going to go into how far backward I went. Trying to focus on positive and move on. I might (should) come clean later.

I have started my part time job. It will be good for me. I think bringing in a little bit more money than normal is just the beginning of the benefits. I also get to make people smile and be productive in a work environment. It is a nice change. Extra training also meant extra pay at the start which was a relief.

I noticed that I am judging all my purchases by the hours I would need to work the part time job to pay for it. I have spent practically nothing this month. Realizing things would cost x hours both sucks and is great. I really like hourly wages over salary. Changes my whole mindset.

Which brings me to my very, very, very little spending this month. About $30 in gas, $9 in dining out, and $75 in households which over $60 was medicines and supplements (still sick). I haven't even grocery shopped yet in March as I had stocked up in Feb and my parents quick picked up a few (milk and pretzels) things I needed. I will need to go this weekend, though.

Even though February was rough, I think I personally am in a good spot. If I keep on this path, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I can do it!

I got a job! Every other weekend, 16 hours worth. Will probably only net $300 a month in the end, but every penny counts!

Slowly can breathe again.

My every-other weekend applications proved productive. I have had four call backs! One I was unable to do the training hours required, one will be a phone interview, and two will be in-person interviews.

I am hopeful.

Also, the bad news I referenced a few posts ago.... turned out it wasn't as bad as we feared. Still more things to verify, but we think the worst is over!

Now if only my weekday work news didn't continue to deteriorate day by day...

Sigh.

But yay! Interviews!

It became painfully clear that my income will pretty much be non-existent these next two months, if not longer. It will cover insurances, but that is literally it.

Luckily, I have been hoarding cash so I can last a good four months if I don't get any income by only paying the cash-only items, but that also means my credit cards will be maxed out by then. Let's hope work turns around soon and that I get some supplemental income from somewhere. So I made a plan and have started executing it.

I applied for a part-time job that will hopefully fit in the little time I have during weekdays and give me a preschool discount. It only works if I can bring one of my kids with when I work. Since my oldest is already there two half days a week, it shouldn't be a problem.

I have also applied to six every-other-weekend jobs. If I don't hear back from any of the others by next weekend, I will also go and apply at low-pay retail. That just involves going to locations and I do not have time to run around until then.

I also applied for eight online work-from-home-when-you-can jobs and have another two in the works. They are website testing, transcription, and data entry work. They won't pay a lot, or frequently, but it will be something.

I am plotting what I want to list on Craigslist to sell. I should be able to start listening next weekend. I have also joined Swagbucks finally. It is kind of a pain, but I already have 700 points in five days. Every bit helps. I hope to use those cards to counter my household costs.

---

As for expenses, I actually tracked every penny for January for discretionary items. I typically generally do this, but I went down to the penny this time.

$124.24 for gas (my new car and filling up my mom's twice after I borrowed it)

$429.42 for groceries (me and my two toddlers - they are on a gluten-free, dairy-free, and picky-eating diet)

$55.90 for dining out (one "family" meal, two fast foods)

$275.52 for "household" (I group all else into this since most of my shopping is Target and I am typically too lazy to split it out. I did split it out this month - $144.87 on medicines and supplements, $83.65 on diapers and wipes, $47.01 on gifts (a birthday), charity (only $10), and surprises (preschool all by himself reward- a very big deal for us!))

February, thankfully, is a short month and will be low spend. Dining out will be gone. My household budget needs to be slashed by a lot. I should be stocked on diapers and wipes to last through the month. And there is no reason for gifts or surprises. I will need more medicine here soon, no way around it, but we should be done with antibiotics and inhalers. We basically have been sick all month. With my oldest starting preschool, I am not surprised.

Groceries will go down a bit, but we typically do not buy too much extra or waste. They have extremely picky/specific diet, so I cannot just shop deals, switch brands or cut back much. Gas is pretty much dead on. Might decrease a little, but probably not much, especially if I start driving to a new work.

My fixed expenses are my $210 car lease, $30 cell phone, and... that's it, actually. Preschool is covered by child support. The lawyer bills will be going on credit cards still to deal with later. Luckily I do not have any housing costs right now since I am living with the parents. I will forever be grateful.

So, that is where I am at... not a good place, but with a plan. I can make this work! I always do.

Well, I finally sat down and budgeted. Should my income remain at its low level all year, I will most likely end the year with $4k to $9k in credit card debt (lawyer fees being the big wildcard). Strangely enough, I am ok with that. No interest will be paid on it this year, so that is a blessing.

I have to admit, I was kind of forced to sit down and think about it. We recieved some not so good family news. We are waiting to see if it turns into really bad or just stays sucky, but maneagable.

The news did put a hold on my being able to get a second job. There is absolutely no time, or energy, to even handle applying. However, it has renewed my interest in selling my extra stuff. Planning to really dig into it in the next week or two. I have also dropped my cell phone down to the lowest possile.

Let's see. I feel like there is so much I wanted to share, but I cannot remember it...

Oh! I have really enjoyed your uber frugal month efforts. I thought about joining, but have had too many needs pop up. It has, however, probably saved me over $50 in these ten days by making me question if things were wants or needs. A few wants did slip in, two carryouts- one for family meal post news, one for time crunch/lack of planning. Total of the wants have come to $40 so far. I regret neither.

I have won my dietbet again. Two in a row! I am hoping to have made enough to counter my failed one last year. I have lost 15 pounds since mid-November! I still have another 10 to 15 to go to reach my ideal range. Money, I found, was highly motivating for me. But I dont think I want to join another quite yet. I need to gain muscle, so I want to strength/cardio train a bit first then re-weigh with added muscle mass.

And, I think that is all for now!

I just sat down and re-did my finances for the next year. It is hard to come with goals as things are still topsy-turvey.

The biggest news right now is that I traded in my $640/month van and leased at $210/mo small, good gas-mileage vehicle. All maintenance, among other things, are paid for in the lease amount. So all I will pay for the next three years (knock on wood) will be the lease, gas, and insurance. I am feeling a lot better about my car situation. Hopefully when my income stabilizes, I can start saving up for cash for my next vehicle.

My 2017 goals are quite simple, but yet tough at the same time:
1) Fully fund HSA - This should be easy. I have it on autopilot. $255/paycheck. This is a high priority due to my children's diagnoses. I will be cutting other discretionary areas in order to be able to do this the first few months.

2) Get rid of credit card debt - I currently have about $4,000 of credit card debt. I expect it to go up here once I get December and January's lawyer bills. It is a 0% credit card thru this year (and some of next). If I can, I will need to put at least $400/month towards it on average, without putting anything else on it. This will be impossible in the first few months of this year, but I sure hope it will work out later the year.

3) Create an EF fund - Start off goal is $1,000. I think I might even focus on that before the credit card payoff. After debt is gone, every extra penny is going to go into this for this year. Eventually, I want to get to $2,000 (one month of expenses), then $6,000, $15,000, and finally, the ultimate goal of $30,000! Someday, that is... ah, dreaming.

4) Contribute to 401K - I don't get employer match, so for the moment I am only putting $10/month in. Once my income bumps up to where it was again, I plan to put in as much as I can. Someday goal includes maxing it out. I need to plan to take care of myself without help from husband or children. I can do it!

5) Create "adult" documents - I need to create a will, power of attorney, medical directives, etc. I will probably do an online DIY one for temporary, and once I have more financial wiggle room, I will get a lawyer and get it nice and cleaned up and tight. I would rather have something than nothing.

Since my last post, between the snow storms and the illnesses in my family, I haven't actually been able to do any of the cost saving measures that I wanted to do.

I did call my cell phone carrier and got it moved over onto my own line. I didn't drop to a cheaper plan though as they had a deal for me this month. It's on my next month to-do list now.

I need to go test drive cars soon though. I should do it today, but the vehicle I want to trade in is a complete disaster for them to look at and price. Needs to be cleaned up and de-toddlered. I will do it this week sometime.

I have found out that my income will be low, but steady for the next few payrolls. It will be up in the air come February, but I already have a cash cushion, so I can handle it if need to be, even if I don't cut the costs up above.

My 0% credit card is my emergency fund right now. It has a good chunk on it right now between lawyer, car insurance, and tires, but most will be paid off at the end of this month. Then I have a good 15 months left to pay off the rest slowly as I can.

As for what debt I will be getting post-divorce, well, I should find out in the next week or so. Hoping that it won't be too bad. It really won't, I don't think. I am cautiously optimistic, but until we are before a judge, I will still hold my breath.

I am still waiting for the shoe to officially drop.

I am very skeptical with my income, I am not sure if I will be getting much in in the next two months. I do know that I currently have enough to make it thru January, and possibly some of February. Thankfully I have no rent or utilities right now.

I am also very hesitant about what debt I will get after divorce is final. I thought we had it all worked out, but a few things have made me think he is reconsidering some of his stance.

So.... financially, I am up in the air. It will all work out in the end, that I am sure. Until I know, though, I am going to be very cautious.

So I have a plan. I am going to get a cheaper phone plan at the end of this month. I am going to trade in my expensive van for a -way- lower payment lease on a smaller, better gas mileage car. I am going to apply for an every other weekend part time job. None of this will hurt me.

But most of all, I am going to keep enjoying my kids and keep doing inexpensive fun stuff to keep them healthy and happy. I am going to continue to lose weight and build up my strength so I can keep up with my active kids.

Life is still good. Tough, Unknown, but Good.

Halfway through writing a post for here, I found out a few things that totally changed my tune.

Originally, I was all happy for this month. Finally feeling like winter. Almost done with joint liabilities. Seeing light at end of tunnel....

Then wham. I think a train is coming and I have to back up and get off the tracks.

I HATE being on uneven footing. I HATE not being able to plan for anything. I HATE not knowing if I will be paid or what my liabilities are/will be. Assets feel useless since it isn't cold hard cash.

I swear as soon as I can I will build up a HUGE emergency fund. HUGE. 6 months to a year style. I will get rid of all debt. ALL OF IT. This I pledge. I am SO DONE with the unknown and being unsecure. DONE.

Time to figure out additional income. Second job? I don't know when/where, but I sure will try. Sell stuff? Another I don't know when/what, but I sure will try!

They are right when they say something you learn something new every day. I had never heard of this, but some you might have.

There is a report for auto insurances called a CLUE report that insurance companies use to check on you before they give you your final rates. I was shopping for a new auto insurances, and here there was an accident misreported on mine, raised my rates quite a bit. It will take awhile to get it corrected. Longer for me, as it didn't like me online. I raised my deductibles to lower the premium, so I shouldn't be dinged too bad for awhile. (cross fingers)

You can get your free CLUE report thru LexisNexus's personal reports page.

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In other news, I really don't have much financial news. Still in holding pattern. Still low key. I just need to make it to January, and every day, it is looking better and better. Just keep swimming. Once January hits, I am pretty sure everything will turn around and be finished, so I can start budgeting for real.

Reflecting on my old blog posts, I forgot that I had deemed 2016 a year to coast. Well, I coasted, switched directions a few times, and then am ending in a coast again. I was pretty right on, just with a big change thrown in. Not like 2015 - the year of changes.

I have been trying to figure out what 2017 will be the year of... I think a year of organizing and getting life straightened out. I am in the process of getting things set up so that it can go that way. I find that I like having control of my own life and its path. This next year should be fun.

I have finally made progress on purging. It feels great! Some of it has been hard, but I haven't regretted getting rid of anything yet.

I paired my clothes down to a third. Some was easy as I do not fit in much. Some was hard like some memory shirts and favorite clothes that reminded me way too much of my ex. I went half and half konmari on it. I had to keep some things that were funtional, even though I do not particularly care for it, because otherwise I would be severely lacking. No money (or really time) for a wardrobe makeover quite yet.

I also have purged papers like no other. I still have a ton, but am down to a fifth of what I had. Helps now that most of that stuff is online. No need to keep historical payments, bills, etc anymore. I managed to get rid of stuff from middle school on! It helped that I finally accepted that my past likes and hobbies are in the past. They helped shaped me, but they have no bearing on me now. I could finally let go.

I still have a ton of physical things I need to purge and sort, but i am happy with where I am now. The rest can wait for a rainy, or snowy, weekend.

Money-wise, I am still in a holding pattern. Spending is still only joint liabilities, gas, and groceries. Tight, but still able to have a little "mad money" as needed to spoil me and the kids (talking like $10 a week). I am noticing that I am spending less and less mad money each week as we adjust to this new life. It feels good.

I cannot wait for the new year. I am working on a goal of new year = happy, healthy and strong new me. I am already headed in the right direction, so i just need to keep moving that way!

Thank you, everyone, for your kind notes on my last post. I missed this community. You guys are awesome.

There is so much going on; it's crazy. Divorce wrecks havoc like no other. Besides juggling kids, their therapies, work and divorce negotiations... Lawyers are expensive. Two households are expensive. Not yet getting child support is expensive. So until the divorce is finalized, I am going to have a good chunk of credit card debt. I am at peace with that and have opened a new 0% credit card with a low balance transfer fee to pay off my old credit cards. I am keeping my spending low. Not being as frugal as I should, but working hard at it.

The silver lining is that once the divorce is finalized early next year, I should be able to knock debt out of the park and start building up my savings. I cannot wait to have a decent sized EF (since there is only me now!), put in the full amount to HSA, and start really tackling retirement fund! It will be awesome!

I think the most annoying thing so far is that I have no clue what debt and assets I will be left with, so I cannot start to plan the debt payoff. Sigh. Patience. I do think that regardless with what I end up with, the boys and I will still be ok. Life is good.